Archive for September, 2015

Robert Pattinson acts all amateur and emotionless in this period piece (1930s) about a traveling circus that is heading for a disaster. He’s the lead, but isn’t a leader at all. He looks lost. Reese Witherspoon is in it too, but plays second fiddle, and Christopher Waltz is the bad guy – again – and steals the show. Sure there are a few freaks and some exotic animals, but the circus is just a setting for a coming of age love story between a young student and a married woman.

Didn’t see the end, because the plane landed earlier than expected. But the story did intrigue me enough to feel bummed about the abrupt end. I’m not going to rent it for the last ten minutes though. Maybe it’ll catch it again on another flight.

Oh and I do think animals should get nominated for the Oscars as well. The elephant in here ‘acts’ as great as any other dog, horse or chimp. Hey, he/she acts better than Robert Pattinson.

Beasts Of The Southern Wild – *

Posted: September 26, 2015 in 2012, Drama, USA, X

Sometimes it takes a while before you actually watch a movie that’s been so heavily hyped that you don’t really want to watch it.

Such is the case with Beasts Of The Southern Wild. It was only a success at film festivals and not that many people bothered to go watch it (either at the cinema theaters or at home). And right they were.

It’s not worth the watch, unless you want to boast about having it seen at a dull artsy fartsy party where everybody just loved the movie (without probably ever having seen it). Yes, it’s that kind of movie. There’s a great review about it that says it all and leave me not writing anything more about it.

It’s shocking to see that members of the academy would nominate a child actress (Quvenzhané Wallis) over experienced and much more talented senior actresses. Especially, since she’s just a child being a child in front of a camera. Her on screen father Dwight Henry is also a non professional actor, but at least he acts.

And yes, it does look nice and poetic. And the fantasy element is a great asset. But it makes you want to re-watch something like San Andreas and appreciate it even more.

Spy – *

Posted: September 18, 2015 in 2015, Action, Comedy, Parody, Spionage, USA, X

How can Spy make more than 100 million US dollars at the box office?

There are maybe five brief moments in the entire movie that produce a laugh. One of which is a battle scene between two women in a professional kitchen. That alone deserves a star.

It’s terrible as a parody because it tries to hard to be a real spy movie.

It’s terrible as spy movie because it tries to hard to be funny.

Inside Out – ***

Posted: September 18, 2015 in 2015, Animation, Comedy, USA, XXX

A young and happy 11y old girl moves from Minnesota to San Francisco and has trouble adjusting to the change. The story however is told from the perspective of five of her dominant feelings: joy, sadness, anger, fear and disgust. That’s pretty clever, original and risqué! But it works.

Humans – even the youngest of the species – have a lot more feelings than the five mentioned above. But for cinematic purposes, focussing on these five is excellent. Kudos’ to the scriptwriters who manage to explain difficult matter to a very wide audience. I’m sure children psychologists all over the world will now be using dolls representing the five ‘feeling’ characters of this movie. The movie also explains the working of the brain in an original way. Memories are stored in glass balls, some of which become core memories that create ‘islands’ of important interest and others become obsolete and get disposed off after a while. It really makes a lot of sense.

Of all the senses Joy is the most predominant feeling. She’s voiced by the excellent Amy Poehler and is an incredibly annoying bossy character. She can’t stand Sadness (a purple droopy goth girl) becoming more important. She hates Sadness to the point that she actually bullies her. The other feelings just play second fiddle and that’s exactly how Joy (she could be a candidate for the Republican party) treats them. Luckily, the script writers add enough proof that Joy really isn’t the most important feeling at all.

The movie is very unique and very clever. It also has a lot of humorous references that only adults will understand, a trademark of the Pixar movies. But this time around the company tried too much to please the little children as well by adding all kinds of elements that kill the excellent atmosphere. And they made Joy an unintentionally unenjoyable character.

However. This is a great movie though. And it has the funniest 5 seconds of any animation movie. Ever. (near the end)

Jaws 2 – **(*)

Posted: September 6, 2015 in 1978, Adventure, Horror, USA, XX1/2

Jaws 2 got a lot of crap reviews when it was released and even later on movie fans dissed this sequel a lot, but you know what? It’s really not that bad. It’s camp nostalgia. In fact, apart from the characters using telephones and the lack of a multicultural cast, there’s nothing outdated about it at all. This could have been released this year.

Hadn’t watched this sequel in more than 20 years, but this was the right movie to rematch at the right time.

Go Chief Brody!

A Brazilian lifeguard fails to save the life of a German biker tourist who went swimming near the treacherous Futuro beach (in Fortaleza). For some inexplicable reason (probably just ‘life’ and ‘cinematic drama’) the lifeguard falls for the surviving travel buddy of the victim. They have sex, then hang out a bit and a few months later they reunite in Berlin. A few years pass and the lifeguard’s abandoned little brother comes for a visit to the German capital.

So. yeah. That’s it really.

It’s slow. It’s boring. It doesn’t give any explanations. It’s a three part tale of a man during three important times of his life: falling in love – emigrating to another country – being confronted with his egoistic departure…

However, a day after watching the movie some scenes still linger. Wagner Moura is a really good actor. He makes the character intriguing, which is quite a feat. There’s this moment where he feels really happy in life and it shows. It’s such a simple scene (getting groceries) but it works. The revelation of this German-Brazilian drama is not the director or the cinematographer and definitely not the scriptwriters, but the young Jesuita Barbosa, who is mesmerizing as the young brother.

When a movie makes you think about how better it could have been if this or that were different, then it basically isn’t such a bad movie.


This Jesuita Barbosa is a young actor to watch out for. Check him out in this simple short movie. Conventional unrequited (gay) love story, but well filmed.

Waste Land – *

Posted: September 3, 2015 in 2014, Belgium, Cop Movie, Crime/Detective, Drama, Flanders, X

The synopsis and trailer looked so promising. A film noir set in multilingual and multicultural Brussels about a troubled detective investigating the murder of a young Congolese man. But the end result is disappointing. In fact, the end result is close to being plain crap.

Luckily there is Jeremy Renier, one of the best Belgian actors around. He carries this movie. A great feat, since the shooting must not have been an easy job. He was a last-minute replacement for Matthias Schoenaerts and his character is supposed to be Flemish. There’s a reference to his character being Flemish early on in the movie which doesn’t make sense at all because Jeremy is excellent as a typical French-speaking Bruxellois who can converse in Flemish when needed. But that’s a minor cringeworthy point. There’s so much more in this movie that doesn’t make sense at all, that it’s really tough to sit through.

First, the director doesn’t seem to know what kind of movie he wants to make. It’s a mix of detective thriller and psychological drama and it fails in both genres. There’s nothing thrilling about it and the drama never captivates. A good director gets you in the mood for a certain genre (Scorcese) or combines it with so much flair that the viewer is hooked from the beginning (Soderbergh). Secondly, there are so many superfluous scenes that add nothing to the story and are plain annoying. Why do we need to see Nathalie Broods nipples? Okay, she’s in a sauna and you’re naked in a sauna. But why are they even in a sauna? What’s the point of that scene? And the recreational drug use? Why is that necessary to show? What does that add to the story? It’s cliché. It’s been done before. Many times. And better. But finally, the most terrible thing about this movie is the script and the story. If it were a book, you would have stopped reading after three chapters.

Luckily there’s Jeremy Renier. As mentioned before. And Geert Paredis who was the art director. Because despite the crappy storyline, you can still enjoy the visuals.