Archive for the ‘Hijack’ Category

The Commuter

Posted: October 23, 2018 in 2018, Action, Hijack, USA

You can’t really blame anyone for making this crap. Apparently there are people out there who want to watch this bullshit. You have to give credit to studios for producing these things, ‘cos they make money out of it. This is probably how it went at the producers’ desk: “Hey, people dig Liam Neeson in the everyday hero part going to extremes to protect his family. Let’s put him on a train this time. Don’t spend money on the script and get a cheap director who doesn’t look at details and only needs a few days to shoot. Oh and release it in Europe, Russia and some other international markets and maybe we’ll get some money out of it at the US box office as well.” “Deal”.

This is terrible. Back in the late eighties this movie would have gone straight to vhs. It’s the kind of movie you expect on a long bus ride in central america, dubbed in Spanish. Everything in this movie in unoriginal and a total mess. This story has been told so many times before. Or at least it feels like it’s been told so many times before. Everything is done by the handbook. First ten minutes: introduce the character. Explain to the audience why he will do what he’s going to do. EXPLAIN his past, his financial problems. SHOW his family and the bond he has with them. Also introduce a few vague characters that will end up being the bad guys at the end. Then: introduce the characters that will ‘matter’ in the rest of the movie. SHOW each and one of them a la Murder On The Orient Express. Then add the random stranger who gives him a task that is so ridiculous that nobody, even with a past in the police force or in financial need, will even try to attempt. Then let him execute the job and fill up an hour with random encounters on the train. Add a few fights. Try to deceive the audience with focussing on people that have nothing to do with the story at all, but look ‘suspicious’. Add a murder, done so terribly well that nobody notices on a busy commuter train. Oh, make sure the train derails as well. And come with a surprise in the end that’s already obvious from the very first minutes of the movie.

NO, motherfuckers, NO.

Now, this all could have been okay, if the details had been correct. But no. There is no consistency. The main character finds 25.000 dollars, puts it in his shoulder bag and then LEAVES the bag on a seat to go make a phone call. Then does all kinds of things without the shoulder bag and then suddenly wears it again. IT DOES NOT MAKE SENSE.

What a waste of time.

www.imdb.com/title/tt1590193

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Captain Phillips – **

Posted: February 19, 2014 in 2013, Action, Hijack, Terrorist, Thriller, USA, XX

Captain Phillips is an easy action thriller based on true events. It’s easy because it adds nothing particularly difficult to the linear and predictable storytelling. A captain takes a container ship from Oman to Kenya and gets hijacked by a small group of 4 Somali pirates. There are 20 to 30 crew members but the whole story focusses on one captain. Boring! And the captain is played by Tom Hanks. Boring.

It’s well made. But it just didn’t excite or thrill me at all.

It may be based on true events, but it is never explained why on earth the crew of such huge cargo ships cannot fire at criminals attacking them on a small ship. I’m sure there is some international law protecting human rights and stuff, but it would have been nice to actually have heard the crew discuss this topic. It would have just been nice to have the crew discuss anything. There is an interesting – but far too brief – scene in which the sailors tell the captain that they didn’t sign up to fight pirates. But then the captain tells them to resign as soon as they arrive in Mombasa and that’s the end if it. I have heard more heated discussions between a captain and his crew on the necessity of removing spider webs from the engine room.

And then you have the pirates of which the leader is the ugliest actor the cast director could find. It earned the him (Barkhad Abdi) an oscar nomination. But for what? Looking scary, confused and inarticulate isn’t good acting. His fellow pirate (Barkhad Abdirahman) is as scary, confusing and inarticulate. And he looks cooler.

Where is the empathy or disgust for these pirates? There is none whatsoever. Boring! There is an interesting scene – again too brief – in the beginning that tries to explain a bit how these pirates operate. What’s the background of these pirate motherfuckers? That’s what is interesting. Not how the Us Navy will end this hijack situation.

In the end you don’t care if someone survives or not.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1535109